It has become very apparent that cremation is growing in popularity. The reasons are many and varied. According to the National Funeral Directors’ Association, the national rate for cremation in 1960 was just 3.56 percent. Fast Forward to today and the Cremation Association of North America projects the entire continent will surpass the 50 percent mark by 2025. That figure includes Mexico, where cremation is being accepted far more slowly than the United States and Canada.
After you and your loved ones have selected cremation for your end-of-life planning, there are still decisions to be made. Namely, what should be done with the ashes of your loved one. Many people are fine with having a decorative urn placed in the family home in a place of prominence. Others wish to be interred in a columbarium at a preferred cemetery. And for many, having their cremated remains scattered in one or many favorite places is their final wish.
Scattering can seem, on the face of it, a very romantic notion. For the surviving family, however, there are considerations that should be taken into account. In an excellent first-hand account, Tré Miller Rodríguez detailed the 9 things that, in her experience, nobody prepared her for and which deserve broadcast in this blog.
Mrs. Rodríguez was only 34 years of age when her husband, Alberto, passed away from a heart attack. He had made clear his wishes for cremation but he had not expressed what he wanted done with his cremated remains. Mrs. Rodríguez decided to take him and scatter him at some of his favorite locations and other incredibly wonderful places around the globe. Her experiences will likely be of great help to any who plan to scatter the cremated remains of their loved one.
- There Will Be Bones – For many who have researched cremation, they are likely aware that the human body after cremation is not a fine powder but actually a combination of ash and bone fragment. For the uninitiated, this revelation could be surprising
- One Time Only? – If a loved one has a single location they want their remains to be scattered, this is not a consideration. If, however, your experience is like that of Mrs. Rodríguez, (where the deceased didn’t specify a final wish), then you will have to decide if you will want multiple scatterings or a single-location scattering. She urges, especially in grief, to consider this point carefully.
- A Good Friend + Ziploc Bag – The first time you are opening the urn to remove cremated remains for transport to a scattering location, Mrs. Rodríguez highly recommends you have a close friend or family member with you. This can be, she explains, a highly emotional experience and a trusted friend can support you or step in and prepare the cremated remains on your behalf.
- Keep Calm and Pack A Carry On – Mrs. Rodríguez had decided to travel the globe with her beloved Alberto. However, in one unfortunate experience, the airline failed to load her luggage with her for her journey. She recommends carrying your loved one on you through the entire trip to avoid undergoing a second sense of loss.
- Site See – If you are traveling extensively to scatter the cremated remains of your loved one, it is possible a location you envisioned in your mind may, upon arrival, just not feel like the right place for your loved one. Don’t fret. If it’s not right, it’s not right. You don’t have to have the scattering ceremony until you find the perfect place.
- Flower Power – Scattering at sea is one of the most favored of scattering services. Mrs. Rodríguez suggests you bring several destemmed flowers with you to scatter on the water with the cremated remains. Not only will it make the occasion more reverent, but the flowers will travel atop the water in the same path as the ash, giving a beautiful sense of closure to you in the process.
- Photographic Memory – If you do a scattering on water, bring a camera. Not only will it preserve the occasion for yourself, but it will allow friends and family who were unable to attend to also experience the scattering and gain, for themselves, a sense of closure.
- Stand Upwind – That Mrs. Rodríguez included this advice speaks to how often surviving family members fail to take this into consideration. Take a moment to judge wind direction and scatter appropriately.
- Have Water Ready – Another fact not often explained is how cremated remains can stick to skin. Bringing water with you will help you to respectfully scatter your loved one’s remains, ensuring all of the ash stays at the location.
It is the personal experience of Mrs. Rodríguez that will help you to understand more fully the challenges that accompany the beauty of a scattering service. We each travel through grief in our own ways. Make sure you and your loved one discuss each nuance of your end-of-life planning.
When you are ready to preplan your cremation, don’t hesitated to contact the compassionate professionals at Smart Cremation. They will fully explain the entire cremation process, making certain you are completely comfortable. Call Smart Cremation today!
